Please continue to keep sharing this website with your friends and family and help me share this story with people that could benefit from knowing they aren’t alone. Please consider helping aclottedjourney.com also, see below for details on that! Happy happy 2022 and welcome to a brand new year of A Clotted Journey, enjoy Part 23, A Golden Time Off! ALSO go and check out the first episode of the brand new podcast brought to you by aclottedjourney.com, CATALYST CORNER!

If you know me, you know that I am very watchful of how people handle hardship. Going through hardship brings forth character, and character is something that in its nakedness, cannot lie. The world is definitely not sunshine and rainbows a majority of the time, but with that darkness, people learn to make do with the light that they can muster. With that darkness, comes light.  

Alex Negro

2020 started with multiple heartbreaks and a worldwide pandemic that was crippling global economies and travel, but it also started with my new furry family member, Mowgli. From the shaking golden lump that sat in my passenger seat on the way home, I knew right away that my adventures with Mowgli would be many. I got Mowgli on I believe a Sunday and was able to be home with him and walking him all of the time for the first week he was home, and then the next week I would have three weeks of work until I was off for another two weeks. Even though Mowgli had been doing absolutely stellar being by himself while I was at work, my little brother Josh, came and stayed with me while he finished the remainder of his high school work his senior year (all of it being online because of COVID).

Every time I think about this little while that Josh stayed with me it almost brings tears to my eyes because of how much I loved having him with me like we were younger. As I have stated many times throughout my story, Josh is one of the main people in my life that I hold near and dear. My two brothers and my family are my rocks.  I wouldn’t be here without both of them in my life, they both have had their fair share of difficult life experiences, but both are trudging through all the same. I look back on seeing my brothers when they were in high school and remember thinking how they would probably never change and always just be a bunch of goofs, but here we are. They have grown up and every time I hear of them going through situations that I also faced I am in awe of the movement of life. They’ve gotten jobs and I am amazed. They’ve gone through hardships and I am astonished in how they handle it. If you know me, you know that I am very watchful of how people handle hardship. Going through hardship brings forth character, and character is something that in its nakedness, cannot lie. The world is definitely not sunshine and rainbows a majority of the time, but with that darkness, people learn to make do with the light that they can muster. With that darkness, comes light.  I have become ever more self-reflecting since watching my brothers grow up and it has given me my meaning at several times throughout my life. I always wonder, if I had an older brother, would I want them to be strong for me? I always try to be the bigger brother that I would’ve wanted, who knows if I ever did a great job at this though. Only they know, but I digress.

Josh stayed with me and he was very excited to meet his new furry friend, Mowgli. He quickly learned that Mowgli was exactly like the golden retriever that we grew up with, Amber, in many ways. He, like her, was addicted to people. So addicted that it can turn into anxiety at times. Some of this anxiety is and was definitely caused by him being abandoned by his previous family. Despite all of the love I was able to give him, I know that something like that will always be a scar. When you look into animals’ eyes you can see pain at times, just like humans. Is it the same pain? Im not sure. But I know that a soul is a soul, and it doesn’t matter the species. He had characteristic anxiety just like his new owner and that is one of the reasons I chose him. My soul knew that anxiety. That anxiety that nothing in the world is permanent despite our greatest attempts at making it that way. Its something that absolutely fascinates me on the daily when I think about it, learning about how humans are born and basically all we do throughout are entire life is organize the chaos around us. Little do we know that every time homeostasis (or normal) is reached, chaos usually ensues once again.

One of Mowgli’s favorite quirks that Josh and I thought was super cute was how excited he got/gets when someone/one of us came back home from being outside. It could be one minute, 10 minutes, or 2 days, and he will give you the same reaction. Absolute bliss and happiness fill his world. His body goes through emotional overwhelm and only allows him to think two things, find something to present to owner in mouth and squeal like a kid at Christmas. I don’t care how annoyed or angry I am about life in a particular moment, all it takes is seeing my Mowgs and his reaction to me coming home to make me realize that I am someone’s world. If anyone ever asks you how much love you deserve, tell them that you deserve to be loved like a golden retriever loves humans (specifically their human/s). Josh was quickly introduced to a new rule that was present in my house as well, you weren’t allowed to drink any liquids without spilling the contents everywhere. This wasn’t because he or I was particularly messy, but because every time we would try and take a drink, Mowgli would nudge your elbow because his pets had stopped for more than three seconds and that was a no-no. To this day, this is a luxury that we get to live with within our home.

All his quirks, all his goofiness, Josh and I truly relished every single moment that we got to be with Mowgli. His attention and love can sometimes be a lot, but he needed us, and that was what meant the world to me. Once Josh had been there for a couple weeks my mom and stepdad also got to come down and meet the Mowgster as I call him. They loved him as well. The resemblance to our beloved Amber was pretty unreal, the only difference being that Amber had a small bump on her skull that made her look a little unique. After they stayed awhile while I was off of work on that next furlough stretch, they left, and I was on my own with Mowgs (and my roommate Brandon who also got lots of love from Mowgli every time he entered the house). Throughout this time of Josh being at my house I had posted a ton of pictures all over social media of our new family member.

The weekend after my family left, I had a going away party for one of my best friends Brittany. She was leaving for the military again to pursue her nursing career. I was so very bummed to say the least. This was someone that I looked forward to seeing every single day and now she would be in a different state! When the weekend was ending, that Sunday morning, my phone made a very loud ding. I looked down at my phone, and it was a text from that girl that turned me down, Megan Pierre. I never would have guessed what happened next.

Stay tuned!

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